15.11.17

My Strange Phobia

Hey Guys,

I am not sure if this is meant to be a serious post or not?
Only a little.
I'm not making this post so you guys can relate because you probably wont but it's interesting to talk about&explain.

So I have this weird phobia that no one I know really understands and that is,

Google Earth

And I probably sound like I'm joking but I am deadly serious

I have a phobia of Google Earth

I don't really know why or how I got this phobia because it's super irrational but I'll try and detail exactly what part I'm afraid of and how I knew of its existence.

So like, a year ago I went on google maps, just casually exploring countries to compensate for my lack of going outside-ness and then since I wanted to see just how big the country I was in was, I zoomed out, and out and out.
And I just kept going until- WOAH TOO FAR 
I COULD LITERALLY SEE THE WHOLE EARTH
AND THE DEEP ABYSS OF SPACE
AND THE AWFUL, GROSS TERRAIN OF THE SEA.

I nearly puked.
I just got this overwhelming, gross, icky, shuddery feeling and I had to close the tab then and there.
Everywhere I look people just think its a phobia of big things or the ocean or something but it's not.
Mainly for me its the texture of the sea.
All bumpy and grainy, it makes me gag.
So I downloaded google earth in an attempt to flood myself (a psychology technique for phobias)
Worse thing ever.
I clicked too hard and it took me into a ground view of Hawaii.
But not of the road, like on street view on google maps
OH NO.
A GROUND VIEW OF A GRAINY, HALF-DOWNLOADED MOUNTAIN.
I NEARLY BURSTED INTO FLAMES

I'd go back and get a picture but I'm too afraid to go back into ground-view. (Also I'm paranoid I'll have copyright issues)
Best way I could describe it is, it looked like the minecraft world, all pixely 

My phobia isn't as severe as my pigeon phobia but it's annoying because it's hard to explain without getting laughed at, which doesn't really bother me but frustrating when I'm trying to get my point across. On websites I've seen people that can relate which is comforting, ill submit links at the end 

I'm trying to think of something else to add but I have nothing.
This was kind of a short post but hey, its something :)
Let me know if you have any strange phobias in the comments because I am genuinely interested in what you have to say!

Bye!

Links:

24.10.17

A Day in My Life

So, thankfully I had a commenter who submitted an idea on what they'd like to see so now its time to produce!

It was a list of four ideas and I chose, what I thought would be the most fun to type first, a day in my life.

Initially I was planning on doing a day during the week when I was in college but I thought it'd be a bit boring and repetitive so I decided to choose Tuesday, the 24th of October.
(I'm on half term, it's super boring but meh.)
I'll go by the hour to make it more interesting.
(Fact: you'll realise how dull my days are)

8:00
- zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz-
9:00
I wake up, groggy and miserable because I've gotten like 7 hours of sleep, I go to the bathroom and then return to bed, trying to sleep some more but I fail
10:00
Still awake& annoyed so I put the Fresh Prince of Bel Air on in the background because noise helps me sleep (idk why).
25 minutes later I'm still awake and grumpy.
11:00
Finally I say "forget it" and get up.
I decide to run to the shop looking like a natural disaster solely because I'm craving a capri sun.
I return and decide to order food because yes, normal people order burgers&waffles at 11am.
10 minutes later the order is placed and I slap myself for dipping into my savings and spending £17 on food.
12:00
The food arrives, Netflix is on, I taste the food and decide "yup, worth it"
After finishing the food I then spend the next 3 hours on my back crying because I'm too full to even move
13:00
-still crying-
14:00
-yup, still crying-
15:00
Crying stops briefly because I decide to roll myself downstairs and put an icepack on my stomach because I literally thought that would work.
16:00
It didn't. -crying continues-
17:00
I somehow get the energy to get up and wash the dishes and make a cup of tea, maybe the icepack did work.
Once the tea has been downed, I try and finish a presentation I've been doing about Marie Stopes.
18:00
Instead of focusing on half-done homework, I put on Spotify and jam to an old playlist.
19:00
THE PRESENTATION HAS BEEN COMPLETED.
HALLELUJAH. 
My phone then lights up, my group chat of friends has found something interesting to talk about so I spend like, 10 minutes making top class banter, then I leave to check my emails.
I got onto this cool programme that also offers a scholarship so I have to check my emails regularly.
20:00
I shower then start more homework, my life is so interesting, wow.
15 minutes later all I have written is one sentence because I decided to watch Dan&Phil.
No regrets.
21:00
Me&friend decide to go into an in-depth analysis of The Vampire Diaries.
This conversation then quickly moves onto cute boys we have crushes on.
22:00
MY FRIEND ABANDONS ME TO GO TO BED. SMH. AMAETEUR 
I contemplate watching Shrek for the 5th time.
I decide on Gnomeo and Juliet.
23:00
This movie is pretty good.
When the movie ends, I decide to switch off my laptop and scroll through twitter.
This then switches to Instagram.
Then Snapchat.
00:00
Lol, still going, alternating between 3 apps and then facebook.
01:00
One of my friends are awake and decides to message me but too late, I've already drifted off
-sleeeeeeep-

And there we have it!
A totally 'eventful' day in my life.
With reading this, you probably realise how much better your days are because mine suck.

Thank you so much to the lovely Madeline M for this and many other good post ideas :)
Check her blog out here, its amazing!

8.10.17

What Would YOU Like To See?

Oh Hey!

So I just had a thought.

I was looking at my blog the other day and I realised, one of the biggest reasons I don't post as often is literally, lack of ideas.

When I just started this blog my head was booming with ideas.

That period is gone now, now I'm always suffering with writers block.

Every post idea is annoyingly harrowing, so I don't even attempt to type it.

But then I thought (literally 7 minutes ago)

What if I metaphorically passed the mic (or keyboard?) over to you.

(There is an 87% chance this will fail, it relies on ANYONE reading to comment)

So if anyone reading has a suggestion for what you'd like to me to post about, feel free to comment

Anything from a Q&A, to a Tag, or A Day in the Week post, literally anything (within reason)

(Nothing too extreme like, "Travel to France and tell us your experience" I'm broke afff)

Or I could do an opinion post, where you give me a topic and I give my opinion on it, anything political I will definitely struggle.
Politics goes way over my head.

But yeah, I have a feeling this will fail but I've have some hope it wont.

And of course, anyone who gives a suggestion, I'll be sure to give them a lovely shout-out for helping this blog not die out :)

And in the off chance that I get loads of submissions (which I probably wont) I'll use all of your ideas!

So this is my plea, if you have an idea of something you want me to post about

Leave a comment

(or if its super long and in-depth, you can always submit it to me via my contact form)

My blog rests in your hands...

9.8.17

The Quest for Maturism

Maturism is a word right?

Pretty sure it is.

I don't think it means what I'm referring to (in this context) irl but I'm assuming you all know what I mean by 'maturism'

But yes, I'm on a quest.
One of the biggest personal challenges I face at work is how to act around my co-workers.
Obviously I act like myself and many of my co-workers love the bubbly energy I emit but its weird sometimes, like, maybe its because I'm the youngest there I always feel like a child.
Like everyone is so grown up and I feel like a baby, and its not really something I can help because I am young but I am trying to find ways to make myself appear more mature.

Some people thought I was in my twenties so maybe its just me thinking that I feel like a baby but still.
I want to make slight tweaks.

Any tips?

-

Part two.

(Yeah I'm shoving two posts into one to compensate for the lack of writing I do on here)

This one is called, "If feelings were a person I'd push them off a cliff"

So yet again, I have encountered another crush.
FUN.
IK IK.

jokes, it absolutely f****** sucks.

I wont go into detail because its longgggg but there are things that makes this person 'unattainable' which is pretty sad.
Crushes never work out in my favour.

LOL OMG THAT SOUNDS WAY MORE SAD THAN I INTENDED IT TO BE.
But yeah, I'm made peace with this whole situation,
but figuring how to unlike someone is very difficult especially when you work near them and they have given you no reason to unlike them (i.e. their personality is the best thing ever)
other than them being unattainable but sadly sometimes that even isn't enough to convince you.

GOD I HATE FEELINGS.
I NEED TO MEET OTHER PEOPLE AND DISTRACT MYSELF.

(I've appreciated that I've turned this into a diary extract)
I'm listening to Ed Sheeran - Supermarket Flowers atm, so its got me all, up in my feels.

Wait?
What was the point of this post again?

Lol, I just wanted to show you guys that I'm still here and I don't wanna post 1 thing over the summer whilst I'm sat here literally doing nothing.

-
But yeah, guys.
Help me out.
Give me some much needed therapy.

If you want to be a bae, comment below, tips that I can follow to become more mature, whether that be a different hairstyle or something and also, tips for getting rid of a stupid, unnecessary crush :)

Thanks! 

(I promise my next post will be something more interesting)

19.7.17

12 Things I've Learnt About Getting A Part-Time Job

Guess who's back?

Back Again,
Liyah's Back
Tell A Friend

(actually don't because I'll probably disappear for another 3 months)

Sorry about that, A-Levels and mocks and literally just taking ALL of my attention but I broke up for summer holiday today!
Woop.
(To be honest, I'm not happy about it at all because school&work are like the only reason I go outside, lol laziness, so now I wont see my friends for like 2 months unless I actively make plans.
Will I?
Probably not)

But yeah, I think I mentioned this in my last depress-fest of a post that I indeed do have a part-time job, I just past the three month mark actually and with that, I have learnt quite a few things.
Things I feel a need to tell!

So I hope you enjoy this post and if you're considering on getting a part-time job I say go for it!
It gives you experience and you get to meet more people, whilst making money at the same time.
However only do it if you can balance, college/uni/school-work with actual work.
I don't work that many hours so it's pretty easy, sacrificing my Saturday mornings is probably the biggest challenge I face.
But yeah.

...


#1 Keeping up pep is hard, especially when people scare you.

I'm pretty sure one of the biggest demands at any retail store is to like, smile&stuff at the customers.
Smiling - easy
Smiling for 4 hours+ - not so easy
My natural, relaxed face is not a smile, its more of a confused - curious face that probably looks kinda rude to other people. BUT I DONT MEAN IT TO BE.
I envy my co-workers that can smile 24/7 and easily engage in conversation with the customers.
pls, teach me.
Working has taught me I'm not as extroverted as I thought.
Definitely ambiverted.

#2 The "first pay-check bliss" is great, but it wears off.

First pay-check bliss : the euphoric feeling felt after getting paid 

(I made this saying up, pretty neat huh?)

Duration : can range from 30 seconds - a month.
Ends abruptly when all of the wages are spent and the bliss turns into DEEP shame.

Yeah, it took me like 12 days to spend my first pay-check.
The bliss has faded, when I got paid I used to be like "YAY"
But now it's more, "I got paid, cool"
(Need I remind you, I've only been paid THREE times, the bliss ended v.quickly for me)

#3 I've grown to hate my town

My work is placed in town, the main part where everyone shops, all the restaurants are and where the big shopping centre is.
I used to love going there all the time when I went shopping for a day-out but now, constantly seeing so many crowds of people.

Yikes.

#4 Standing up is, a challenge.

I work on tills which means I have to stand up for a prolonged amount of hours, this proves to be a challenge sometimes.

It was HORRENDOUS when I first started because my legs weren't used to it but now its kind of mellow.
Still tires me out though.

#5 I forgot how much I like meeting people

This seems to contradict the first point but trust me, It's different.
This regards my co-workers, majority of them are around my age and knowing them is an absolute pleasure, I forgot how fun it was to meet teenagers, with point #1 I'm mainly smiling at grown adults.
So yeah, getting to be more social is a huge bonus.

#6 I thought working would help me lose weight

It hasn't.
Because what ever calories I lose by working gets immediately added back on when I annihilate a double cheeseburger meal.
I have no self control.
Plus where is work is conveniently placed in between numerous fast food shops and dessert shops, so, I shift some blame onto that.

#7 My work has a smell, I like it.

Like the staff area has this weirdly-nice perfume-ish type smell.
Very hard to explain.
It smells like perfume, kinda but also like, a work-place?
So I guess that's ideal.
Lol.

#8 I'm pretty privileged when it comes to work, I should appreciate it more.

The supervisors are soooo nice and it's easy to talk to them casually, just like if they were your friend.
They are also very understanding and its great.
I also do get quite a lot of breaks, my friend who works at a different retail shop, gets way less so I'm pretty lucky in that aspect.

#9 When the customer line gets really long, the pressure kicks in.

This happens virtually every shift and since the summer holidays have arrived, it'll get worse.
Oh God.
And I have a habit of bagging way too fast and it tires me out, its because I feel like the customer is growing impatient, my co-workers tell me to calm down and go at my own pace but it's literally so hard not to do.

Also, what i've learned about long lines is, its better to have them than not because when the line is long you focus on serving customers efficiently instead of staring at the clock, therefore 25 minutes could've passed and it will have only felt like two.

#10 When I have like, two minutes left until my shift ends, I often make a deadly mistake

When I have about less than 5 minutes left until my shift ends sometimes I look at the next customer and I'm like "oh, they look like they only have a few items to purchase, I'll just do this transaction and then clock out"
I call them to the till and from behind them they pull out TWO LOADED BASKETS.
 

What. Have. I. Done.

So then as I'm processing this transaction, I watch my co-worker squad walk off the tills and I resist the urge not to burst into tears.

#11 Sundays have become my new Saturdays

After going to college from Monday-Friday, I think pretty much every student yearns for Saturdays where they can lie in,
But since I work now Saturday is not really considered a weekend day for me anymore, (other people at my college that have part-time jobs feel this way too) therefore Sundays are like how my Saturdays used to be.
Sunday is my lie-in day now.
And I cherish Sundays so much more now.

...

And there we go.
A few things on what I've learnt from having a part-time job.
I don't really have anymore to say other than, I hope you enjoyed reading!
Hope it made you laugh :)

Byeeee

27.4.17

I am Trapped





My unintentional three-month hiatus is over. If you thought I forgot bout you, think again.


Let me just re-express that this hiatus was never planned it kind of just happened, you probably think I’m lying and rightly so, I have had many opportunities to post something but instead I neglected my blog completely.

Apologises.

But it was a mixture of laziness and complete writers block but since I have been gone so long I do have some pretty cool updates.

#1. I got a job, finally. Not the job I intended to get because I had other places in mind but I’m still grateful. I won’t reveal it on here just because, but it is a very popular, very cheap, very big retail store in England and America (I think)

#2. I’m still 16. But I won’t be in a month’s time. I plan on getting a rainbow cake. (May 31st don’t forget guys ;)

#3. My Instagram plan failed in a horrific mess. I planned on having a cute page filled with pictures that were posted regularly but that plan literally collapsed in on itself.

#4. I plan on abandoning every moral I have. I promised to myself that I would stay loyal to the Android phone crew and stick to having a Samsung phone and I do currently but I plan on getting an iPhone next.

What can I say, although the IOS updates will be annoying and iPhones break so easily, the camera is amazing, the snapchat is better and you can get an iPhone case for cheap LITERALLY ANYWHERE. Literally any retail store.

Also the more expensive iPhone cases are beautiful, if you wanted to get something like a Marble Samsung Case it can’t be a lesser known Samsung like a J5, it has to be the latest like the S8. With iPhones, all their phones are widely known and you can get a gorgeous case for literally any of them.

Anyways, I’m getting side-tracked.

You’re probably wondering what the hell the title of this post is about.

It kind of originated from a Religious studies class I just had, like literally an hour ago.

I’m typing this at school on word and the environment is very loud.

The religious studies class was about ethical egoism and it focused on Max Stirner (a Philosopher) and we someone got onto the idea of what life would be like without any laws, rules, or social norms that we have collectively imposed as a society.

Some went with the obvious answer:

Corrupt.

 
But my friend was puzzled when I said, “It would be better”
 
Let me explain.
I put down on paper that it could go one of two ways, chaotic or just, better and I do know that people would utilize the freedom they have and become completely ungovernable and just cause terror but for others like me, it would be complete bliss, no social norms, no fears of what people think and no obligation to go to school.
With that, I would leave, maybe not permanently but anything can happen.
I feel trapped, in a bubble I cannot escape.
It’s not that I’m too lazy to escape, I just can’t. I’m held back by school, no money, no permission to leave and no one I can leave with because let’s admit it, It’s a naïve idea.
I want to go somewhere, no place in mind but just somewhere, anywhere.

wanderlust

ˈwɒndəlʌst/

noun

wanderlust

a strong desire to travel.

"a man consumed by wanderlust"


Without rules or anything, I’d take myself and I’d get into a car or a coach or a train and I’d just go, live somewhere new.
A new environment with new people and maybe sit in a field and read.
Or just go to a close coffee shop, order a drink, and sit and look outside the window at people passing by, wondering what thought is occupying their mind at that very moment.
I think about this all time and it makes me sad because to be honest, I’m not living the life I want right now and I only have one which makes it even worse.
You’re probably all thinking,

“You have so many years to lead the life you want”

Yes, I do but I want to use every year, every minute and every second I have to lead the best life I can.
But that’s not seen as realistic, is it? Nope.
Instead, revise for exams.
Go to work.
Etc.
Maybe everyone is secretly like that because that’s what I think, I think that a majority of people dislike the position they are in at this current moment and would rather be somewhere else.
It’s hard to accept that we can’t escape but it’s harder to accept that, that’s our reality.
I just want to get away from the environment I’m in, maybe because of stress but it’s more to do with a powerful curiosity.
I read a quote somewhere but I cannot find it anymore but it said something along the lines of –

“The whole world is your home, don’t forget to explore it”


My heart is so full,
Full of love I want to give,
Full of impulsive curiosity to just get up and leave.
I hope one day I have the courage to act upon my desires.

Thank you for reading.

Liyah.

9.1.17

RIP My Blog (Crucial Advice For Bloggers)

So...
As you can see, my blog has changed, again.
It was formerly "The Terrible Tales of An Awkward Teen" but now it has changed to "Liyah's World"
The reason behind this is,
the other day I noticed on my site instead of the banner and the welcome picture and my button showing up etc. there was a white exclamation mark in a grey box.
I was really puzzled by this and tried to look up ways to fix it and I found a blogger who ran across the same problem.
Pretty much the only way to fix it was to remove the pictures causing error and replace it.
I was really heartbroken by this because I had someone design my blog for me and I didn't really have much knowledge of how to go about changing my blog title and such so I used picmonkey since it was the only thing I could think of.
I don't think it turned out too bad but I will do more to completely remove all the errors, this includes making a whole new button.
I tried to contact the designer of my blog since she designs very well but her blog had completely disappeared and I tried everything to try and search for her but it seems she has vanished.
It was very distressing.
So after a lot of consideration I decided to re-brand my blog name to "Liyah's World" because I felt like previously having the name "Awkward Teen" and having a cartoon as my Google+ picture felt kind of.. childish so I have taken a step in what I believe to be a better direction.
My URL is still the same and I don't really plan on changing it, for now anyways.
But this whole change is what inspired the title "RIP My Blog"
In a way to commemorate the two good years that I was known as Awkward Teen :)

Anyways onto the advice, it comes from the story I just told and I believe its pretty worthy to know especially if you have just started blogging but it is also useful for current bloggers too.
Make it your mission to know how blogging works 
I should've known this sooner but I've learnt my lesson now, if you are going to get your blog designed by someone, make sure you are certain they are going to stay contactable just in case anything goes wrong and also make sure you know how to do things just in case they disappear such as creating headers and things like that because if you just rely on the designer and you have errors you don't know how to work out, you'll be left in quite a sticky situation.
Blogger simplifies how to do things pretty well so don't worry, you wont have to take an extensive course on how to use blogger or anything but if you do not know the basics now and you plan on blogging and running your own website, make sure you know.

Thanks for reading.